I can’t get rid of that memory stain. It refuses to be washed out.
No matter what I do, who I see (for help), or where I am, it is always there.
I look forward, towards the future, and try not to think about the past, but I know it’s there, hauntingly revealing itself to me wherever I go.
Do you have memories that just cling to you like a bad smell, like a stain that refuses to be washed out?
You have found forgiveness from God for what happened. Others may have forgiven you. You may have forgiven yourself.
The memory still remains, though as a natural consequential brain recording of the event.
Don’t you want to just have an eraser for the brain that you can take to those memories?
Paul, I believe, personally referred to these memories as a ‘Thorn in his flesh’. He had the memories of all the atrocious things he had done. Murdering people because of their faith.
He even made the claim of being the ‘chief of all sinners’.
What do you do with those memories, stains, and thorns?
Here are some thoughts
- Acknowledge they exist. Paul didn’t run away from what he had done. He fully acknowledged his embedded stain.
- Embrace them in the Grace of God. The undeserved kindness of God is now what gives true and deep comfort and strength.
- Know that out of these memories, stains and thorns, something powerfully good can be released. Something pregnant with compassion and mercy can be gifted to others.
- Consider how these events have shaped you in good, and not so good ways. Who have you become?
- Question how much do those past events define who you are now in your eyes, and in the eyes of others? You are not defined by your addiction, or the mistakes made in the past or in fact even the abuse or traumas you have experienced. You are who God says you are. Loved, significant, and forgiven. Your memories, stains, and thorns are just echoes of the past, not the present. Who truly defines you? Surely only the one who knows you better than you know yourself can.
- Know that there will be a time when there will be no more stains, thorns, or memories. When we are Christ’s presence forever there will be no more stains or thorns. No memories that will ‘pop -up’ out of nowhere that throw you into panic and tears.
- Invite God to bring you the comforter with all truth, and recall to your mind what you really need to know.
- Trust in the one who says this
I will sprinkle clean water on you, and you will be clean;
I will cleanse you from all your impurities and from all your idols.
I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit in you;
I will remove from you your heart of stone and give you a heart of flesh. Ezekiel 36:25 -26
Perhaps over time, and many repeated spin cycles, the stain will lose some of its vividness, the thorn won’t be so pointy and the shadow will begin to dim.
Question to consider and leave a comment.
What has helped you with Memory Stains?
Barry Pearman
Photo Credit: emdot via Compfight cc
