Having an Open Hand

It takes energy to hold a closed hand, but with gentle movement, we find an open hand. In openness, we both give and receive.

A few years ago, I noticed that my right hand was often clenched tight into a fist. Not a fighting fist, but more a fist that was anxious and tense.

I would wake at night to find my hand closed and bound up tight.

I think the body at times reflects in posture what is going on internally in the soul.

It was my closed hand that was speaking something to me about my inner world.

So I began to consciously choose to open my hand. To relax the muscles, allow the energy that was tight and bound up to soften and seep away.

Then I considered if I am living a life that is open-handed to others. To being generous and also being vulnerable.

Or am I being tight, keeping it all in and to myself?

An open hand

Takes zero physical energy to maintain. It just is.
Is open to give
Is open to receive
Is vulnerable to whatever could happen

A closed hand

Takes energy to maintain
Doesn’t give easily.
Is closed to receive. Any gifts offered to it slide off the side unwelcomed.
Becomes ‘unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable.’

“To love at all is to be vulnerable.
Love anything and your heart will be wrung and possibly broken.
If you want to make sure of keeping it intact you must give it to no one, not even an animal.
Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements.
Lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness.
But in that casket, safe, dark, motionless, airless, it will change.
It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable.
To love is to be vulnerable.” C. S. Lewis, The Four Loves

Have an open hand

Jesus said these words about an attitude of the heart being actioned out in our behaviours, particularly in our relationships.

Give, and you will receive.
Your gift will return to you in full—pressed down, shaken together to make room for more, running over, and poured into your lap.
The amount you give will determine the amount you get back. Luke 6:38

Whenever I hear these words, I echo jump to when I was in my Pentecostal church phase and it being used as a kind of spiritual manipulative tool to give financially to the church.

It was taken out of context. It wasn’t about money, or giving to get, or financing ‘blah blah blah.’

It’s about relationships and living an open-handed life, even to those you find difficult.

Before verse 38, there was verse 37!

Do not judge others, and you will not be judged.
Do not condemn others, or it will all come back against you.
Forgive others, and you will be forgiven. Luke 6:37

Jesus was talking about connection with others. Not passing judgments or condemning them, but living a life of being open-handed.

Living with an Open Hand

This freedom of being open-handed in relationships trickles out into a freedom to be open-handed in other areas of our lives.

We don’t hold on to our possessions so tightly. A need is seen and we open our hands to it.

We welcome the stranger, give encouragements and find buckets of love being poured back in return. A new unforced rhythm of grace becomes our dance music.

Walk with me and work with me—watch how I do it.
Learn the unforced rhythms of grace.
I won’t lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you.
Keep company with me and you’ll learn to live freely and lightly. Jesus Matthew 11:30

To live an open-handed life becomes a norm, a habit, a lifestyle.

Does it mean that I repeatedly open my hands to those who in the past have driven a nail through it with crucifixion passion?

Probably not. Discretion is needed and only Jesus, in all perfection, can handle those sorts of continuous woundings.

Turning the other cheek does not mean you have to keep taking abuse. Read more here.

After a while of giving with an open hand, you might notice little ways in which something is being placed back in your hands.

As I write these words, I am sitting on a deck early in the morning. The sun is rising. Bird song is breaking the silence.

I have, with open-handed delight, given myself to working with the head gardener of the universe (Jesus the Christ) to help make and create the vista before my eyes.

My openness receives autumn colours. Duck’s quack and splash in a pond I helped create. Late roses still sing welcome.

I receive into my hands my gift in full and overflowing.

Those ducks sound like they’re having a great old time quacking and splashing.

Why does this matter?

Many people I talk to and meet in life have closed hands.

It takes energy to hold that posture.

Depressing anxious personality changing energy. Whether it is abuses, neglect, pain, or loss, the hand has become closed.

It’s sad to find this, but with gentle massage and a working of the fingers, the hand begins to open and find freedom.

It’s scary at first, but over time the hand opens and welcomes in life. It gives out forgiveness and embraces a new dance.

You can’t wash people’s feet with closed fists.

Questions?
Comments?
Email me 🙂📨
barry@turningthepage.co.nz

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Quotes to consider

Love never gives up.
Love cares more for others than for self.
Love doesn’t want what it doesn’t have.
Love doesn’t strut,
Doesn’t have a swelled head,
Doesn’t force itself on others,
Isn’t always “me first,”
Doesn’t fly off the handle,
Doesn’t keep score of the sins of others,
Doesn’t revel when others grovel,
Takes pleasure in the flowering of truth,
Puts up with anything,
Trusts God always,
Always looks for the best,
Never looks back,
But keeps going to the end. 1 Corinthians 13
Opening up your soul to someone, letting them into your spirit, thoughts, fears, future, hopes, dreams… that is being naked. Rob Bell.
Only love can soften a hard heart.
Only love can renew trust after it has been shattered.
Only love can inspire acts of genuine self-sacrifice.
Only love can free us from the tyrannising effects of fear. David G. Benner

Questions to answer

What’s the challenge for you in living with open hands?
What is your natural hand posture? – Open, closed, friend or fist?
What’s the risk of being generous?

Formation exercise

Consider the posture of your soul. For an hour, notice in yourself if you are being open or closed. Is it a welcome mat or a closed door? Begin to physically keep your hand open. Notice it as a place of receiving and giving.