If you knew me, would you still love me? We all need others who will be strong enough to handle what comes from the inner world of each other. When they had opened up, they looked at me and wondered if I would reject them. So many others had. I […]
‘Shoulds’ can pile up on the shoulders and shape our thinking. But we have efficacy. We have the power to make a change and stop ‘shoulding.’ We don’t have to live under the slavery of a ‘should.’ It was always the same message. ‘You should be doing better.’ ‘You’re not […]
Some trauma memories keep us locked into our past. But there is a cleansing that can happen. We need to bring ourselves to the presence of one who will wash us pure. I didn’t know what to do when they were sharing some of the stories of their past. I […]
One failure in life seems to collect another failure, but love can cut through any collection of failures. We need to listen for the shame that has been collected then meet it with heartwarming arms. If you can talk about failure, you can talk about anything. As he opened up […]
Men aren’t talking, but they need to. We need to enter the cave of man’s mind and encourage him to talk. Words flow when we listen well. It was early in the morning, and I was driving to the first job of the day. The day was starting dark, cold, […]
How did I get here? Well, it was probably down a well-worn track in your brain that said ‘when you feel this feeling you do this.’ But we can choose new ways of behaving out of our emotions. When you are feeling anxious you can choose a new motion out […]
Men are in crisis and need help for their mental health. But one of the obstacles they face is finding counseling and support that is suited to them—seven tips on how to counsel and support men. Nine counselors. Six men and three women. That is how many counselors I have […]
Men need help for their Mental Health but have reasons they avoid counselling and therapy. We need to understand men and the obstacles they face so they can get the help they need. When I suggested he go to see a counselor to get some help with his anger, I […]
The verbal abuse kept raining down until the thought ‘I am a problem’ got nailed into the brain. But then they discovered that a problem is a problem, not a person, and they began to separate their identity from the issues. It was abuse. Verbal abuse. Dished out every day […]
A feeling of being sad is something that everyone experiences. Sadness needs to be validated as being real and OK. Life hurts at times, and if we don’t embrace the pain, then we can miss a grace offered. Permission to be sad ‘I give you permission to feel sad.’ It […]