I never saw it coming -the cataclysmic argument that triggered my adult son to estrange me three years ago. I might never see it end -the suffering of ambiguous loss of the relationship without closure. Coined by family therapist Pauline Boss, Ph.D., 40 years ago, ambiguous loss refers to unresolved […]
forgiveness
Taking absolute responsibility for your actions can be overwhelming, but hope can be restored when absolute forgiveness is offered. I don’t like it, and I’m sure you don’t either. It’s when you’re confronted with something you have done wrong. You want to run; you want to hide. Perhaps you make excuses, blame […]
We retain them. All the hurts and pains of life, but what if we could forgive and let them go? Perhaps then we could dance freely and lightly. It’s so easy to do. Holding on to the hurt others have done. The brain seems to retain it, keeping it and […]
We pick them up. Little hurts, big hurts. But how do we learn not to keep a record of wrongs that clogs the arteries of our life? I visited a friend the other day, and they invited me into their home. As we wandered from room to room, everything was […]
We need a weight loss program for the heart, but we can’t do it alone, so a vicar steps in and declares, ‘You are forgiven. Be at peace.’ I could feel a kind of weight leave my body. I had carried this tension and held this stress for so long […]
To demand or expect forgiveness is like a chess player trying to manipulate the board, but that’s not true repentance. Instead, repentance submits itself to the poetry of waiting, praying, and hoping. They thought they could use the Bible to manipulate and control. Verses were hurled, and they were told, […]
Accepting the consequences is a repentant heart saying ‘Yes’ to what has been done, praying for mercy, and possibly discovering grace. A few years ago I was caught speeding. I was going too fast. The police officer pulled me over and asked if I knew what speed I was traveling. […]
We do something we regret and want to make amends for, but what about the heart. Come as a servant but don’t become a slave. I was working in a garden the other day when I accidentally knocked over a small pot plant. It toppled over and fell onto a […]
Are you tired of being the Scapegoat but don’t know how to stop it? Six key steps to stop being the dumping ground of other people’s rubbish. She felt like they were making her a scapegoat. They were saying she was responsible for all the terrible things that had happened. […]
We can live warped lives because of a shadow hanging over us, but that shadow can be removed if we face what’s causing the shadow and allow the light to flood in. Have you ever walked in a shadow? Of course you have, but you probably didn’t take much notice […]