Some people can help you restore. Some you need to put out of the room. What are six qualities of people that restore the soul? Life can give you a battering at times, but there are some people that seem to be able to come alongside and help you restore. […]
Relationships
86 posts
I never saw it coming -the cataclysmic argument that triggered my adult son to estrange me three years ago. I might never see it end -the suffering of ambiguous loss of the relationship without closure. Coined by family therapist Pauline Boss, Ph.D., 40 years ago, ambiguous loss refers to unresolved […]
Trouble comes. It’s nothing new, but we have the assurance of others, so we hold on tight and ride our way through it. You can see it coming. You’re sailing along. Life seems to be going along ok, but out on the horizon, you can see a storm. You know […]
Events happen in life, and we can get controlled by the lies we believe as truth, but there is hope. It is a memory seared into my brain. I’m at an age now I can’t remember what I had for breakfast, but this is among those memories that I doubt […]
We retain them. All the hurts and pains of life, but what if we could forgive and let them go? Perhaps then we could dance freely and lightly. It’s so easy to do. Holding on to the hurt others have done. The brain seems to retain it, keeping it and […]
People can let us down. We let others down. But there is one that we can entrust our ‘self’ to that is solid and true. Deep knowing grows that makes us strong. I’ve been dwelling on a word lately. Entrust. Words carry power. They connect thoughts, memories, ideas, and wisdom […]
There’s work, home, and loneliness, but maybe a third place can be the place of hope. Let’s make one together. I’m looking for a third place, and I think you might be too. It’s a place where I feel that I belong and there is no pressure to perform, to […]
Four types of power play a part in our lives, but the power that will transform you enters your ditch and is with you. I’ve seen it all. Through the eyes of my half-dead body, I watch them come, look, and then go. Will no one stop to do what […]
When we’re half dead and want to be fully alive, we need a love that crosses a line. He was half dead. She had been stripped naked. They had worked him over, taking enjoyment from the assault. I leaned down over her nakedness and heard a whisper, ‘Help me.’ I […]
What’s your shape? I’m not talking about your body shape, i.e., weight, tall, thin, short, or wide. I’m more interested in who you are under the skin. What has happened to shape you into the person you are? What is your personality like? What do you like to eat? Favorite […]
We all have lines around us. Mostly invisible. People cross the lines, and we are hurt, but we also cross the lines of others. The line had been crossed so many times that they were losing their own personal identity. Bullies, thugs, robbers, and thieves had crossed over into their […]
We pick them up. Little hurts, big hurts. But how do we learn not to keep a record of wrongs that clogs the arteries of our life? I visited a friend the other day, and they invited me into their home. As we wandered from room to room, everything was […]
Every Saint Has a Past. Every Sinner Has a Future. So what choices of forgiven acceptance are you making in the moment of the now? The source of the phrase ‘Every Saint Has a Past Every Sinner Has a Future’ comes from Oscar Wilde’s play A Woman of No Importance. […]
They were always wrestling with comparisonitis, but that changed when they accepted themselves and became a peacemaker to their parts. It seemed they were always striving. I was wanting this and wanting that. They couldn’t make peace with the fact they weren’t meant to be superman or wonder woman. They […]
They were sitting with sadness, and life was fading away, but once they recognized its presence, they could accept it and learn from the shadow. Do you like shadows? When I’m working out in the sun’s heat, a shadow provides a respite. A place away from the intensity of light […]
We all have a story, and it’s full of ‘and’s, but this is a story to learn from. So, therefore, we notice the ABT framework in ourselves and others. There is a pattern to our lives; once you see it, you will see it everywhere. It’s in every great story, […]
People say you need boundaries, but what do you want to protect? When you know your ‘YES,’ you will be able to express your ‘NO.’ This website is founded on the word ‘Yes,’ but in order for the Yes to be realized ‘No’ has been said multiple times. I have recently […]
You have a story. You are a story. To receive a story is to listen to the white space between the words. I hear stories every day. You do too. But there are some stories I hear where I sense I am on sacred ground. It’s when you feel that […]
We want a behavior change, but it doesn’t seem to happen. However, it will happen with many changes in the mind (repentance). We always notice significant behavior change, don’t we? Yet, people who change dramatically are often given the stage and a microphone to trumpet the difference. I remember as […]
To demand or expect forgiveness is like a chess player trying to manipulate the board, but that’s not true repentance. Instead, repentance submits itself to the poetry of waiting, praying, and hoping. They thought they could use the Bible to manipulate and control. Verses were hurled, and they were told, […]