I Am Known

I am Known

In a world of loneliness, we need the reassurance that ‘I am known’. From this, intimacy grows.


One of the questions many people face is ‘Do I matter?’

For many, it feels like they don’t matter to anyone at all. That they are just a blip of dust in eternity.

All of which can be part of a dark downward spiral of depression.

Do I really matter at all?

To be known and have value, I think is one of the core human needs.

Are you known?

Fear of being known

One of the reasons people are reluctant to get help for Mental Health struggles is that it means opening up to someone.

Perhaps that’s why so many keep coming to this website.

They like the anonymity of reading a webpage.

If the webpage asks questions that go a little deeper than is comfortable, they can simply leave. They can unsubscribe to anything that might be challenging.

We want pleasant things Isaiah 30:10.

We often live in a fear of being fully known, because we reason that if someone knew us then surely we would be rejected.

So we run, hide, create masks, and avoid.

I know many people, but it’s a matter of depth isn’t it.

There’s knowing and then there is KNOWING.

The ones I know deeply are the ones who have allowed me in. They trust the nakedness of their soul with me. It’s a precious gift for someone to be that real with you.

I have very few who know me at a deep, vulnerable level. I’ve been hurt by intruders. You may have been too.

I am known

A story from the life of Jesus points us to a kind of being known that we all want.

Jesus is sitting outside a town next to a well. A woman comes to draw some water and they have Soultalk. Words flow between the two. Jesus gently brings out various aspects of her life and asks her questions.

It leaves the woman completely astonished and with a compulsion to tell her community about this conversation.

Then the woman left her water-jar and went back to the city. She said to the people, ‘Come and see a man who told me everything I have ever done! John 4:29.

What would it be like to be fully known by someone else?

That someone knew everything you have done yet still wanted to intimately connect with you.

It’s the kind of knowing that the Psalmist writes in Psalm 139

O Lord, you have examined my heart and know everything about me. 

You know when I sit or stand.

When far away you know my every thought.

You chart the path ahead of me and tell me where to stop and rest. Every moment you know where I am.

You know what I am going to say before I even say it.

You both precede and follow me and place your hand of blessing on my head. Psalm 139:1-5

It’s the being known that envelopes us in safety.

We are not alone. We are known fully, deeply, and perfectly.

Listening to loneliness

I think for many people that come to this website, there is a sense of loneliness. That they are running life solo and independent.

Yes, they may have friends and family, but in the dark places they will type the lonely questions into an internet search engine.

They want to be known, but also safely unknown.

They are ghosts to deep connection.

But actually they are known.

They are more known than they realise.

There is nothing invisible to God. Nothing unknown to the oceans of love and grace stored up for them.

We listen to the loneliness and point each other to the truth of being fully known by one who will never reject us.

Rehearsing the truth

Speak this truth of being known deeply into your being. Say it over and over again especially when the voices of loneliness come close.


Email me 🙂📨 barry@turningthepage.co.nz


Quotes to consider

  • “What’s the price of a pet canary? Some loose change, right? And God cares what happens to it even more than you do. He pays even greater attention to you, down to the last detail—even numbering the hairs on your head! So don’t be intimidated by all this bully talk. You’re worth more than a million canaries. Jesus – Matthew 10:29-31
  • One of the deepest sources of my own loneliness is that so few people seem to have much of an interest in exploring my interior world. Larry Crabb
  • We think — wrongly — that God can only love perfect things. What a tiny and weak God that would be. Richard Rohr -Job and the Mystery of Suffering 
  • It is the unrivaled wonder of the gospel of Jesus Christ that no other God has wounds. Os Guinness

Questions to answer

  1. How afraid are you of being known?
  2. How much do you think the internet is used as a source of anonymously asking deep soul questions?
  3. What would it be like to be that woman at the well and Jesus gently displaying to you that he knows everything about you and loves you still the same?

Formation exercise

  • As part of this series of I am Held, I am Known, and I am Loved, the exercise is to say to yourself those three little truths four times a day.

Further reading

I Am Held

How to Create New Rope Bridges in our Thinking

How to Develop a Compass for the Brain

Barry Pearman

Photo by Abhijit Sinha on Unsplash


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